Humility 101

When it comes to humility, I am definitely a "beginner" and desperately in need of lessons.  I took a trip to the hospital early this morning (12:20-2:30am) and got a couple doses.  I was having contractions that felt more real than ones I'd been having before, plus I was stripped on top of that and was hoping that it had helped this progress.  I still wasn't in significant pain, but with Jeremiah's schedule at school and this being his final week (tests) and stuff... I was trying to work fast!  Resulting in me going in too early.  I didn't have much progress (if any) from earlier that morning. It was good to see that the baby was well and in a good position for the next little bit it will be in there - so that was comforting news!  While I was there, a woman was rushed past my door (the curtain was pulled in my room, so I couldn't see anything) - followed by delivery sounds (woman struggling to hold onto her control) and then rushed off in a wheelchair after the call "I need some help in here, I have a fully dilated patient!"    Needless to say, the woman delivered - hopefully in a delivery room... I couldn't hear a baby cry or anything of that sort, so I am just assuming of course.  BUT, that experience HORRIFIED me!  I started doubting myself and thinking.... I feel like I am pretty beat up this 4th time around and how am I going to cope with the pain?  Basically, I'm currently afraid of pain - who isn't?  It is causing me to really worry about this delivery - and I know I shouldn't.  I'm a veteran, right?!  Please keep your fingers crossed that I can figure it out and be tough/brave!  I can do this, I can do this!!!  I CAN!   Having that scare has sufficiently humbled me to be willing to allow the LORD'S will.  Imagine that, trusting in the Lord (who knows best of course!) and being willing to allow things to happen the way they are supposed to!  I am now VERY hopeful the baby will hold off until Friday when Jeremiah is done with classes and can be there for me 24/7 for whatever I need.  I am hoping that is the Lord's will, but will take whichever day the Lord deems is best.   I am humbled and now VERY cautious to not overdo things!