Quick recap on what has happened in the last 18 months of our lives.
Little Momma had her 8th birthday this past summer (after Hubby deployed). In our church we believe in baptizing children when they are 8 years old and have reached the age of accountability where they can better discern right from wrong. This is a very special moment for us in our church and because it is, my husband felt it was not a good idea for her to wait until his return. She was baptized by my dad close to her birthday. Of course she was heartbroken her dad couldn't be there for her, but we got through it and tried to make her feel our love and support despite the absence of someone she loves dearly. She is currently in 3rd grade and hitting some bumpy roads. I recently discovered that she had been skipping some of her homework so she could take advantage of a few nice days we had a few weeks back. After a parent/teacher/student pow wow, I hope she feels she is on a great track to improving her grades and enjoying the rest of the school year. This year has really thrown us for a loop as so much has changed and there is a lot more responsibility placed on this children this year. Not to mention the SOL's that will happen later this year for them for the first time in school. We get the "unfortunate" privilege of doing "Achieve3000" reading comprehension tests on the computer most days of the week. They are so boring they could put ME to sleep! These poor kids these days, having to be subject to the most boring articles known to man. She is persevering though and I am so proud of her for that!
Destructo girl is doing wonderfully in school this year and making huge strides. She has recently been signed up for an online educational game for strengthening her math skills that she gets to practice everyday and she LOVES it! (REFLEX math) She is very helpful with a girl in her class with down syndrome named Laila. She has had the privilege of being in what is called an "inclusion" class where they have children with different learning difficulties and I feel this is just the class for her. No, she isn't one of the students with a disability. She is able to show others the huge heart that we know she has had all along. She loves being able to help others and be a friend to them. She has been able to learn to accept others who are different from her and see them the way that we should all see them. Her teacher Mrs. Crabtree is the most amazing woman! We love her so much and are happy she is part of destructo girl's education!
Little man made it into the Pre-K program this year. I have heard about some mothers holding back their sons an extra year. I opted not to do that with him this year because of his slow speech development. I was hoping to get him into a speech program through the school (that is what his doctor recommended as his first course of action). Fast forward to now... almost halfway through the year. We are making progress in that area, but the process is VERY drawn out and slow. I am hopeful that we will be finished with the assessments and paperwork by the end of the year so that by the start of K he can get the help that he needs to help him excel in school. He currently loves school and has some amazing songs to reiterate the things he is learning. I will try to get a few uploaded and linked. He is pretty much the most handsome son there ever was (and of course I am COMPLETELY biased)! Lately we have had a "game" he started. He says to me, "Mom, can I tell you a Secret?" I put my ear to him and he whispers "I love you" to which I am supposed to reply with a whispered "I love to too!". He absolutely loves it! Baby girl and I walk him to his door each day for school and everyday he INSISTS on giving us both a kiss and getting one from each of us in return. Sometimes if it seems he will forget, Baby girl even instigates! I have some amazing kids.
Baby girl should probably now be called mini destructo girl. Since she has been about 18 months old, she has been into EVERYTHING. She has a lot of personality traits that remember me a lot about destructo girl when she was young. I have a hard time keeping her under control during sacrament on Sundays. We haven't been able to make it the whole way through that 70 minutes of sacrament yet! We are working on it, and believe me... even though I should be able to get them to behave WITHOUT a kindle to hang out with, I must admit that is how we make it through many a sacrament meeting with the older 3. They have to take turns of course (no way do they ALL have their own)! I said we were a military family, right?! We cannot afford that mess, at least not right now. Two weeks ago she took off for the front of the chapel at the beginning of the meeting and this past Sunday she spent the last 10 minutes of Sacrament meeting screaming her head off in an empty classroom with me barricading the door. Yes, she can now open most doors. Her favorite movie to watch is "the croods", to which she wants to watch almost every day since our "road trip" to see my parents for Christmas this year.
Hubby made 1st class Petty Officer in March and has finished his "shore duty" as an instructor at the base here this past May. He departed for training for an IA (individual augmentee) year long deployment to Fort Jackson in June and left for Djibouti in July. We are now 7 months in to this deployment and have heard some preliminary information about this next command. Nothing is "set" yet, but it looks as though he will be stationed on a Destroyer that will deploy shortly after his expected return from his current deployment. It makes us all sad to think about having him around only 4 months from June 2013-June 2015. However, that is the military way of life sometimes. Before you think, "Well, hey, that is what they signed up for", let me set you all straight before you place yourself in the "ignorant" category. NONE of us know what our life/career in the military will require of us. We are hopeful that our story will be one where our spouse/father/son/brother are not gone for long stretches of time over and over again. We are all hopeful that the Lord will smile upon us and grant us an "easy" career where they are around to help raise children, see them grow, be at school assemblies and programs, help mold them into wonderful people, and celebrate special days with. As it stands, many families are not stuck in the same unfortunate circumstances that we have and continue to be in, but please know that there are many who are in very similar situations as we are, many more than I would care to have to admit, as I am sure there are some in much worse situations. When you vote each year for your representatives, president, remember that. The more staffing we lose in our military, the more is required of each military family. More Christmas', Thanksgivings, anniversaries, birthdays, births, etc are missed so that the needs of our military can be filled with those who are still in it.
Lastly, what am I up to? Just about everything! I serve with the women's organization in our church and am "head" of our monthly activities, which I mostly set up and clean up for on my own.... literally. Well, I take that back... I have a few helpers, all with the same last name as me and AT LEAST 20 years my junior. I take care of the cars, trash, cleaning, sick kiddos, bills, fixing, maintain the cars, homework helper, gym frequenter, lunch preparer, dog exerciser, basically... I run everything around here. Anything happens... it falls on me. I have to wipe away the tears that the children shed because their daddy will miss another Christmas with them, or a birthday. I am the one that gets to shed my own tears of sadness when he isn't here for our anniversary, fathers day, or family holiday. Lock yourself out of the house? I get to pick the lock to the garage door to retrieve the keys from the car with an old store loyalty card (completed this past Friday). Car need a new tire? I get to take the old one off the car, throw it in the hubby's car and drive it to the tire shop, then bring it back home to place back on the car and keep my fingers crossed I tightened all the lug nuts enough (did that today). Kids throw up all over the house? By far this is my LEAST favorite thing to clean up as I usually come close to throwing up myself when I have to clean it. Not to mention trying not to get myself sick. Ever been a "single parent" with a house full of sick kids and you're sick yourself? Yeah.... I don't recommend it, avoid it at all costs. There are a few other things going on in my life that I cannot really talk about right now, but yes, I go through things. Yes, some of them are hard with most of them not "fun" by any means. How am I doing? I am absolutely fine, sure I have bad days, of course it would be nice to get to the store without any of my kids. I have learned to lean on the Lord and am still learning to put things in His hands (because, let's face it... some things really are hard to turn over to Him sometimes. As
****Disclaimer: This post was not written in order to gain pity, sympathy, or any such thing. It is merely a way that I can try to keep track of the challenges I face so that someday my children can see the things I have been through and know they are not alone in their trials in life. It is also meant to serve as an educational tool. I honestly believe that NO ONE (except our Savior) can understand exactly what a military family goes through unless you have LIVED it. Please do us all a favor and don't tell a military spouse how "you just don't know how they do it all, they must just be amazing." or "wow, that just must be so hard". Save it. PLEASE, I am BEGGING YOU! Why, you may ask? Quite simply, because we have heard it all before. You reminding us of the fact that we are going through hard times does NOT help us get through it any better. If you want to help, be a FRIEND. Don't just talk about all the things you couldn't imagine having to do on your own... it just makes us sad because then you force us to think about how sad we maybe should be about it all. That just ends up brining us to tears (whether you see it or not) When it boils down to it... we mil spouses just, "Ain't...got time fo' dat!" ****
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